Coming down and moving forward

Originally posted on Rollings In Haiti.

I feel like my body has been coming down over the last few days. Not just from the earthquake, but from about a month and a half of busyness and not sleeping well. I’m fighting a bit of a cold, always a sign that I’m run down, and napping. Wow that napping. I’m not a good napper but the last two afternoons have seen me konked out for several hours. And I’m sort of feeling human again, not like a walking zombie.

Chris didn’t end up going to Port last night as our friend found two other trucks that were already available in the city. We’re thankful because we’re down to one truck and yesterday the truck was already loaded to go to Port to deliver filters. It would have meant having our crew come back early, even if they weren’t done, so Chris could turn around and return. Our guys were able to finish and get people water, so it was a good day.

I keep thinking about our adoption. We’re communicating with everyone we can communicate with and doing what we can do. Because our adoption is being done through Canada things are a bit different for us. I keep thinking different things like how wonderful it would be to be able to walk out of an airport in Canada this year with my daughter for the first time. Then I have to push down the fear that we might get forgotten in the fray. We aren’t at the visa and passport stage, which is where focus is now. We hadn’t finished getting Haitian approval. Our file was literally sitting on the desk of the person that needed to sign it. That office is standing, but none of the others needed to finish processing adoptions are. The fears I keep pushing down are that we’re going to keep getting the run around, that we need to talk to our home province, who has no participation, or that there is no information at this time etc, simply because people don’t know what’s going on. We have a good main contact at the Embassy and I know with her help this won’t get dropped. We are prepared to do what we can to help the process. It’s hard for me to know that other countries are taking orphans out that hadn’t yet been matched with a family while our daughter who has lived with us for years might get stuck in the system. It’s complicated and hard, but we do feel positive about it at the same time, like at lease there’s a chance something might happen this year, rather than knowing it was unlikely like we did a few weeks ago.

It seems that Haiti is already falling off the radar, which makes me sad. Though, I guess once you clean up the dead bodies from the street there isn’t much left to see that makes good news. People don’t want to hear about all the frustrations of working here in a situation like this, and don’t even want to entertain the fact that maybe it’s nothing new. I’m annoyed with people talking about how electricity and water have been lost, because they were never regular normal things to start with. I’m fed up with people talking about aid on message boards and saying that they should have the right to send in whatever they want and people should just accept it because it’s a gift., with no regard to how unhelpful some of those things might be. Blankets so people don’t have to sleep in the cold? IT’S HAITI! I want to get in their faces and tell them that they are so out of touch with the world that maybe the best thing they could do for all of us is just stop talking, but then I remind myself that to people that “get it” they look like fools. In situations like this I realize how closed off some of the world is to the realities of the rest of the world. I’ve said it on here before, but I’ll say it again… one thing I learned after moving here is that I had thought North America was the ‘norm’. It’s not. It’s the exception. There are people all over the world that live on less and live in more suffering than we will ever understand. I am grateful that God has called our family here and that my kids will grow up with a greater knowledge of the world. I hope it makes them more compassionate and gives them more of an open mind.

I have to admit too that I’m kind of glad the media wave is dying down. It was crazy and fun to have so many people interested in the blog, but I like knowing that the whole world isn’t watching. I want to be able to write about my kid and our family and not feel like people all over the world are stopping by and maybe criticizing it. I like our little “community” here :) Thanks for loving on us and for walking with us.

Have a great Sunday!

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